"Saying that guys are more violent if they have big muscles or do sports is a logical fallacy. That is all. The 'hyper masculinity is toxic' is a load of crap. If you don't like big muscles and strength, you don't like dudes (and that's ok too)."
Meh.
My understanding from things I've read is that "athletes" are somewhat more likely than other demographics to abuse steroids to get big muscles; prominent side effects include overagressiveness and decreased emotional control in general, even if these characters don't also take artificial stimulants like cocaine or methamphetamine to "improve performance". Some research I've seen suggests that non-drug-abusing athletes with naturally big muscles are likely to have higher-than-normal natural testosterone levels as well, producing milder versions of the same effects.
So why are musicians also implicated in higher-than-normal levels of violence against women? Again, drug abuse probably plays a major role. Many of the violently abusive male musicians you listed were known alcoholics and/or drug abusers. In addition, like athletes, musicians tend to come from economically disadvantaged and unhappy family backgrounds; something that seems to predispose people to be abusive, from what I understand.
Unfortunately, like the culture around certain kinds of music, the culture surrounding competitive team athletes tends to shield and sanction inappropriate violence to a deplorable degree. So no, I don't see the culture of athletics as a way for "men to be strong and get their aggression out in a healthy way." (I know, by the way, of no cognitive literature that suggests that practicing actual violence in one setting will "get aggression out" and thus reduce the inclination to violence in other settings: quite the opposite.) I see that culture as a way for inappropriately aggressive people to be part of a group that passively and actively reinforces, supports, encourages and rewards bad behaviors. I can do without the sportsball.
If you want to be all muscular and manly, go climb a mountain or something. Heck, punch it if you want; I promise it won't mind, and it will give you a nice lesson in the pain and futility of violence that, Lord willing, you can take home to those you love.