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I'm done! *flop*I've been dreading writing my essay for my scholarship application. I finally have it done, and I think it's a darned good essay… As an urban university, Portland State attracts a diverse student population and provides many opportunities to learn and live with persons of varying backgrounds and experiences. Drawing upon your personal characteristics, cultural heritage, home, school, community, and work experiences, please discuss: (a) what you might contribute to the learning environment at Portland State, and Many of the students I see at PSU think college is about taking classes, getting a degree, and (optionally) getting good grades. They don't speak up in their classes and simply go home when they're done studying. I feel that college is about so much more than classes. It's about gaining networking skills, participating in a community, and getting hands-on experience in the field you're interested in. I believe that these three things are very important to a successful career. Portland State University has been great for me because I've participated in several community learning projects. One of the best has been the Portland State Aerospace Society, a student club devoted to designing, building, and launching amateur rockets. The electronics and software projects I've worked on with the group allowed me to gain hands-on experience in a complex engineering project. Last year, I was elected president of the rocketry club. I've worked hard to get engineering students involved, and to gain more visibility and funding for the club. As a woman in a male-dominated field, I bring a unique perspective to the Engineering program at Portland State University. Currently, women make up only 9.16% of PSU's Computer Engineering students.1 Engineering has long been portrayed as a "man's field". Teachers and parents tend to encourage men to pursue engineering degrees because they are perceived to be more "mathematically inclined" than women. I personally love to challenge these stereotypes. I'm living proof that females can succeed in math, science, and engineering. I love to be a role model for other women who are beginning their college career in engineering. After I finish my bachelor's degree in Computer Engineering, I plan on pursuing my Computer Science Master's degree at Portland State University. For the past year, I've been involved with the Intel Undergraduate Research Program. The program is designed to introduce research to minority students in engineering and encourage them to pursue graduate studies. The program has allowed me to concentrate on research in several areas I'm interested in: Linux, embedded systems, and USB. This research should generate journal and conference papers, and it demonstrates that I will succeed at graduate-level research. The college student who has nothing more than a degree is indistinguishable from the crowd of applicants. Through my projects and undergraduate research, I've gained hands-on experience that will be invaluable when I start my career search. Participating in an engineering community like the rocketry group also shows employers that I can successfully communicate and work in a team. With the skills and experience I've developed at PSU, I hope to avoid the "entry-level" grunt work that many graduates have to put up with. My extended network of professors, industry professionals, and rocketry club members will be invaluable contacts to lead me to my dream job, working with Linux and embedded systems. 1 Statistics gathered from the Office of Institutional Research and Planning.
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Nice essay!
Nice essay!
One change I'd make is to replace the endnote with an inline parenthetical; endnote style seems out of place here.
Another would be that I would "namedrop" the folks you are and have worked with; it's good to give them the credit, and it makes it clear to the folks reading your application that you're not just making your accomplishments up. But of course, this advice is quite self-serving.
You might also want to stick a couple of URLs to your work in there, for those referees who live in the 21st century. We need to get you a dead-trees publication to cite.
I really like the theme, and you did a nice job of writing clear, readable English. Congrats on getting it done. Here's a dirty secret—I hate writing this stuff too.
How to cut an entry
The online help isn't very good. You can cut an entry by putting
as a paragraph at the cut. I took the liberty of going ahead and cutting this one for you—hope that's ok.
Perfectly reasonable. I
Perfectly reasonable. I hate hogging screen space. :)
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