Pirate Haiku

I'm still bitter about the Pirate Haiku contest…

Some time ago, our local newspaper the Oregonian had a contest for the best Pirate Haiku for National Talk Like A Pirate Day. I was aiming for the Second Prize: pirate underwear. I haven't submitted to any of their contests since then, because darn it, mine were better than their winning entries.

But don't take my word for it: judge for yourself.
The plank is ready:
It's "Talk Like A Pirate Day"!

Can you walk the walk?


A bold privateer
Seeks a booty beyond price:

Pirate underwear


Avast ye lubbers!
Face the pirate poet scourge!

Men of hai-kurage.


Seventeen quick breaths
Sixteen men on dead man's chest

One pirate haiku


Fearsome buccaneer,
12-year-old Brianna L.,
MP3 pirate.

Compare for yourself, and tell me I wasn't robbed.